It’s like the old joke – Don’t like the weather? Just wait a minute (or a microminute). The reviews are back and the new site was not received all that well. My colorblindness struck again. Whenever the image of mint-melt-away-colored vomit is evoked you know that you haven’t exactly struck gold.

My new strategy is to let time determine what you see. I have used the power of computing to randomize the background. This is a temporary fix, but I might let it stand for a couple of days.

In the next couple of days you *might* see an “I like this color combination” button. If you like what you’re seeing, hit the button. It will report the combination to me.

Well... it was time for a change. So, I've redone the site. This was long overdue. I'm not sure that I like it, but, for now, it will have to do. I still need to add the little touches (e.g. the art). I did my best to make sure that it looked alright in both IE and Netscape, but I didn't do any real cross-platform testing. As such, if you run into problems, please let me know.

[edit]

Apparently entries look a lot better if you wrap the text. The problem is that I don't have a lot to say here. You are currently reading my version of Ipsum Lorem. It's a lot like those vanity cards that the guy from Dharma and Greg would use. Well...except I suspect that he took a little more time with them. -- Finn

What is it about the phrase “No offense, but…” that seems to remove the shackles of good taste, polite behavior, and general respect for other people? In my life I’ve never heard the phrase “No offense, but…” followed by anything but, uh, offense.

For instance:

I’ve heard “No offense, but you need to get your ass on a treadmill.” I haven’t heard “No offense, but you look like you’re in great shape.”

People have the attitude that NOB casts this magical spell over the other party whereby the rudest, most offensive comments land like a shower of rose pedals. “Uh shucks… I AM morbidly obese. Thank you for noticing.”

“Really? You think my haircut sucks. Thank you for taking the time out of your busy day to help me. I don’t know what I would have done with the next eight weeks. I was going to go on with my life but now I have something to concentrate on while it grows out.”

The close sibling of NOB is, of course, “I don’t mean to be rude, but…” These people are great. They apparently are so proud of their innate ability to be rude that they must announce to the world, “This comes naturally. I’m not even trying to be rude and look – I am.” I would be much happier if people would say, “The next comment is rude, but…” Another option would be “I’m doing my best to be rude so..here goes..”

In a brief moment of kindness I gave away my soul.

For someone who generally finds people annoying, in the right circumstances I am quite helpful. I try not to be protective of my ideas and my works. The result of this is that I am often quite willing to share.

Over the years I have received numerous e-mails asking regarding the technical details of my website. For instance, how did you get the collapsible side bars? Or how is your Netflix queue in there. I respond and do my best to get them up and running. This is just part of who I am.

I really didn’t think twice when I received a request for my whole site (minus content of course). After all, this person and I each started with a generic blogger template. She, like I had previously done, was moving over to MoveableType and wanted to keep a similar look. Being the helpful gent that I am I zipped everything up and wished her well.

It wasn’t until a couple days ago that I started to feel a little odd about the whole thing. It’s not her fault. She was quite respectful in her request. My thought process at the time was, as always, it will force me to change and move on to a new design. I have yet to do that and I now feel like there is a doppelganger website out there. After my spiel the other day about content within context this somehow seems odd.

Some might call me nosey; I like to think of myself as observant. The bottom line is still the same: if you’re doing it in public, I’m probably watching. I’ll eavesdrop on conversations (sometimes I’ll even join in). I’ll look at what you’re wearing. I’ll watch what you’re buying. I’m not a peeping tom, mind you. I won’t stand at your window and I won’t listen from a hidden location. There is nothing nefarious in my actions. I just don’t buy into the whole "avert your eyes" theory. I refuse to let you shift the burden of your privacy onto me. Yammer away on your cell phone and I’m not going to mentally chant “LA LA LA LA” so that you can have a private conversation in public.

Well… the other day I was at the grocery store buying dinner. The guy behind me came in and placed a huge box of Tampons on the conveyer belt. He then proceeded to look intensely at his shoes. Either he had the most interesting pair of New Balance Cross Trainers on the face of the earth OR he was trying to avoid eye contact with the non-feminine-hygiene-buying population.

For a split-second I was filled with an empathetic embarrassment. Somehow society had brainwashed me into this Pavlovic response. Why exactly is it embarrassing for a man to buy these things? I would think that it would be much more embarrassing for a woman to buy these products. It’s not like I was sitting there thinking, “Poor bastard – it’s time for him to flush out his uterus.”

Women, on the other hand, might not want to announce the current status of their womb -- and god forbid that they deal with an idiot checker and show a little irritation only to hear the under-the-breath mumblings of others, “It’s that time.”

Hoping to relieve his discomfort, I initiated conversation, “Having your period?” Shockingly this did nothing to ameliorate his discomfort. I was greeted with an icy stare and a inaudible response. Oh well... I paid for my food and with a hearty wave I said goodbye, “Until next month!”

The more and more I read about the Kobe case the more and more I question our legal system with regards to rape cases. Don’t get me wrong; I understand the intentions of rape shield laws, but I don’t think it reads, “Guilty until proven innocent unless the charge is rape.”

We go out of our way to give the defendant the benefit of the doubt in other cases. Here, on the other hand, we tie the defense’s hands behind its back.

For instance:

DNA suggests that the accuser had sex with another partner after Kobe and before the hospital. How can there even be a question as to whether or not that evidence is admissible? If you disregard the extremely unnatural aspect of that behavior (if she was raped), there is still the fact that it very well could account for physical injury. It’s like saying, “I got mugged and then I went down to the gym to spar. After that I went to the hospital.” You can draw your own conclusions, but to say that it’s not relevant is absurd.

Furthermore, it’s beginning to look like the prosecutor forgot his role in the process. Unlike the defense that has a duty to fight for the client regardless of guilt, the prosecutor’s job is to prove the truth. It turns out that the prosecutor knew about the text messages before charges were even filed. To make matters worse he simply needed to request them from AT&T. Why didn’t he do so? He isn’t allowed to say, “I can’t look there; I might not like what I find.”

People can’t argue that all these rules are helping women in their cause. The whole thing just upsets me.

For well over a decade pundits have heralded the coming of the paperless office, and for decades we have waited. It’s not here. Furthermore, it won’t be coming any time soon.

“Why not?” While most people point their fingers at hardware, I say, “Hog Wash!” Invent all the PDAs, Spot devices, Tablet PCs, E-Books, etc. that you’d like to and we still aren’t going paperless. The fundamental problem is a software one. The lack of adequate hardware is just a red herring; it’s the red cones indicating that the bridge has been wiped out.

The real reason that people won’t give up “paper” is that, for unstructured data, the search and store abilities of the brain far exceed those of the computer. It is this superiority that allows data to be placed in context and, in turn, allows the value of data to be maximized.

For all the advancements in computing, computers are still horrifically bad at finding a piece of data when the data set hasn’t been bent to the will of the computer. That is to say computers are wonderful when the data with which they are dealing can be broken down into figurative columns and rows. The computer is at its best when its purpose is to process information. For instance, the data used (and generated) in a sales-forecasting model exemplifies the usefulness of a computer.

For the rest of the data, on the other hand, they are awful. This failure is masked by the fact that most people have been using computers for long enough to have been trained *by* them. The paperless office falls into a different category. Unlike process-bound data, the paperless office relies heavily on storage-bound data. To make matters worse, this data if often unstructured with its purpose to come later.

With rare exceptions the user is still required to explain to the computer why that datum is important to him/her and why s/he might come looking for it again. This is at odds with human nature. People are constantly collecting information. The majority of this data is collected without specific purpose. As the data is being collected associations are being made. Where was I when I read that? What was happening? Was it hot? Etc. These might seem like insignificant details. However, they all provide context. They allow the brain to recall information, but, just as important, they also provide subtleties that increase the value of the data.

In his seminal work “Understanding Media” McLuhan proclaimed “the medium is the message.” Largely misunderstood to mean that content was inconsequential, McLuhan was instead explaining that we often focus on the obvious and that by also viewing the context in which the content was delivered subtle changes can be observed. It’s the context, or more specifically the subtle distinctions between contexts, that is the message.

This leads us to the paradox that portends the failure of the paperless office. In order for a paperless office to be achieved the data must be normalized. Normalized data is without message. Data without message is of lesser value. People will, often without being aware of it, maximize value. That is not to say that people will exclaim, “I’m attempting to preserve the context.” They will, however, resist as they explain, “I just seem to like the feel of paper better.”

Until both the content and the message are recorded people will resist the paperless office.

I know that I often complain about spam. When you get 500 pieces of junk mail per day it can start to get to you. But really... who the hell would ever get the following piece of mail and say, "Hey -- that's a company that I want to deal with."

Subject: cotangent
Body:

I am sorry that it took so long to review your application but you were finally
app rov ed with 3% fixed ra t e. To get [Full Lo a n Appro v al] visit < A HREF="http://www.quis23.com/st/index.php>this page and enter final details. The bank office manager will contact you about your lo a n
asap.

Thank you and we appreciate your business!

Best regards,

Client Service Department
Lester

______

OH yeah -- there's also the obligatory spew of random letters at the end:

xdhsufxpv cranpuc hzkmqwy nnjdyuz gonmcax lqyxem wocabwqei
mevizmdz skrwkap kdlgqb yyxhkklmp zbzzvmzpz hrrki uuptbpdu lgdwz
jpgwtpl gctcopvn ltxgzya etmiric rvekkb nhwcplmmv
ykoxhufjk ayyfzhk bzrbhu npiohjoe uiliwejlj pnfnvnoi gcdgjw
auaeztyqh sfdlacqx. tywjmuvrf zrxivie phzqqcd ffsboqd, tvfpk
enfjpa vrxvp msgxhj vtrhizmw iozdkzdzo szxaquo

Today’s idea comes from the “I want someone to make this” department. Wouldn’t it be nice if you could buy a mini Bluetooth keyboard that was about the size of a pager (perhaps slightly smaller)?

I am getting quite excited about the upcoming Motorola Mpx220. However, one aspect of the phone that slightly worries me is data entry. If I could toss a thumb keyboard into my briefcase for real data-entry, I would be one happy camper.

I know what you’re thinking, “Why not get a Treo?” Because I don’t want to permanently dedicate the space to the keyboard. For me, the phone is primarily an output device. I will use it to check schedules, read mail, etc. However, I would like to occasionally be able to sit down in the airport and whip off a medium-sized email.

So… someone out there make such a device and then send me a couple of them as a thank-you gift.

My stint as a cable-television Vice President is nearing its end*. We are also comfortably moved into our new house. With the previous two statements being such it’s time for me to once again decide what I want to be when I grow up.

In my relatively short life I have been lucky enough to work in several different fields. I have run a net-ops/call center which catered to the likes of Apple, Macromedia, Pointcast, etc. I have been a Chief Product Officer for an Internet company. I have also done consulting for other software companies. These have all been great jobs and I’ve learned a bunch in each.

The one thing that remains constant is that good people rise up through good organizations. If you’re willing to work hard and you’re willing to put yourself on the line, people recognize that.

This is quite a freeing fact. The takeaway is that I am confident that I can start just about anywhere within an organization and eventually find a place that fits both me and the company. In the meantime, the company gets quite a bargain and I am offered insight that I might not otherwise get. It’s a win-win situation.

If you’re not concerned with money (which I’m generally not) and you understand that the race is long (there is nothing worse than someone who doesn’t pay his/her dues), it’s a path that makes life interesting.

However, there is a downside; sometimes people just don’t get it. “Why do you want this job?” Because, for one reason or another, I find it interesting.

Where is all this going? It is an attempt to explain my interest in QA. The life of a QA person is not necessarily a fun one. QA is the most underappreciated position in the software development field. So why would I consider it? It’s simple; I have always come at products from the user side: I need to spend some time coming from the development side. I think that it would help to round me out.

In any case, that’s where I currently stand. I will, of course, continue to write. I was recently asked to write some articles for Engadget.com. Here is the first.

If you know of anyone in the Redmond area who is looking for a smart, driven guy who is willing to earn respect the old-fashioned way, drop me a line (or forward this post to him/her). It should be said that I am in no way limiting myself to one path. It’s amazing the things that I find interesting.

*We recently sold the company to Comcast.

There is no greater question than “Why?” Oh sure – there are the big ‘Whys’: why are we here?; why do we love?; etc. However, those questions are too vast in their scope. Far more interesting to me is the mundane version of why (think God vs. god). Why did they put that light switch there? Why is there a blue reflector in the middle of the road? These are the questions that keep my neurons firing.

I always start with the assumption that, contrary to conventional wisdom, decisions are made for a reason. That’s a bold assumption. It is especially bold considering my other long-held belief that most people are idiots. These might on the surface seem like two beliefs that cannot occupy the same space. However, you need to understand that there is very little in this world that is actually new. As such, we are free to say that the idiot doing the work might never know why the decision was made. That’s quite different from saying that it wasn’t made.

Let’s take for an example a contractor hanging an external door at a business.

He hangs the door in such a manner that it swings outwards. He does so because, well, that’s the way it goes. I bet he doesn’t think of the people rushing out of a burning building. I bet he doesn’t think that if it opened inward people could rush the door and create a situation where everyone is trapped. I bet he doesn’t think that the fire would cause the air to heat and, in turn, to expand. He doesn’t think that the pressure could cause the door to get sealed, but someone did. Why? Because doors aren’t new and their design has gone through many iterations. Test out my theory; do the business doors around you all push out to the street?

If we believe that most little decisions are made for a reason, the next step is to observe. Those blue reflectors in the road are there for a reason. Why? Because why else would they be there. Stop and look. Take inventory of the world around you. Observe! Observation is not only free it’s worth its weight in gold (well … if it weighed something). A wise (and VERY successful) man once said to me, “I was a valet for a summer in college. I made twice as much as all the other valets because I thought about how, when, and where I parked the cars.”

I am constantly amazed that more people don’t observe the world. I am even more amazed that people don’t ask “why?.” Perhaps it’s for the best – we don’t want too many people trying to think. After all, people are idiots. Hmmm.

This weekend I learned that I might not be who I think I am.

It’s the little things in one’s life that truly define who a person is. Jobs, age, marital status, number of kids, etc., they are all checkboxes in the big database of life. Their status is merely a way to determine which mortgage company will bug you and when it is time to think about buying life insurance.

The idiosyncrasies, on the other hand, sum together to tell the big picture. Which joints crack in the morning? What little tunes get stuck in your head? Is your body a little odd in how it handles things?

“Does it have raspberries in it?” is a question that I have asked thousands of times in my life. And why wouldn’t I have? After all, I am allergic to them. Moreover, I am deathly allergic to them. Well… at least I thought that I was.

This weekend I ate a piece of lemon cake which had a thin layer of raspberry jam between its layers. It wasn’t until later that evening that I discovered my, uh, mistake. Did I learn through the large welts that quickly covered my body? No. Did my throat tighten to deprive me of the so-needed oxygen? No. My actions came to light in a far more pedestrian manner; I made a comment to the bride about how I liked the lemon cake better than the chocolate cake. She was a bit taken aback. She had gone out of her way to make sure that there was a non-raspberry option just for me. Needless to say, this was not the lemon cake. Had it not been for that conversation I would have never known. It turns out that I might not be allergic to raspberries.

I suppose that I should be happy that my life is no longer in the hands of a little red berry. This is especially true seeing that I am also color-blind. However, I can’t help but feel that I have lost a little bit of myself. I am the person who draws attention to that little red berry, but I’m not. Now I don’t know what I am.

I’m not yet ready to sit down to a raspberry pie yet. I might need a bit of verification. This weekend I could be the guy sitting in the hospital eating a raspberry or two. However, more than that, if you spend 30 years associating the smell of raspberries with the sweet smell of death, you might not end up really craving them.

It’s all just too strange.

GearBits.com has gone into hibernation. That's a shame. Craig is a nice guy and he was selling himself short by implying that GearBits was just another place where you read about gadgets. He brought something different to the table and I will miss that. I could be a little biased though: I love anyone who likens my writings/thoughts to those of Ira Glass. ;)